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nostalgia There was something in the air then. It was winter and we had rosy cheeks and high hopes. It all felt so right. Like for once we were exactly where we were supposed to be. The ocean was violent, but only confirmed whatever was growing inside us. The freedom was tangible. Our ideals didn't break on the shore with the waves. We had found a lost relic of undreamed importance, it had no name, or specific shape, but we could all feel it. We could feel it in the warmth of the fire, in our breath in the freezing morning air, we could see it in each other's eyes, in our smiles. It was something we couldn't talk about because none of us could find the words, but we didn't need to anyway. There would have been nothing to say, it was already complete in itself. I've never felt warmth emanate the way it did then. There were so many of us, we had similar purposes, and similar goals, and we found ourselves on similar paths for a while, and we were conscious of it. And it didn't feel like an accident, or coincidence. It felt bigger than that. It was completely encompassing. There were only bits and pieces of understanding, moments when it made sense, you could hear it in certain notes of our laughter set against the singing of the crickets. It was more real than anything. I haven't felt anything like that before. It was like rediscovering a part of me I had forgotten about a long time ago. For the first time in memory I felt completely content. I felt whole. ----- - - 6:32 p.m. , January 29, 2005 personal empowerment - 9:48 p.m. , January 12, 2005 jaksdf - 7:22 p.m. , December 19, 2004 the break up - 11:08 p.m. , December 16, 2004 fists of rage - 6:28 p.m. , December 13, 2004 |